When I was thinking about how to title this issue, this song came to mind:
This is part of what I learned by examining 2015’s lessons.
Telling myself that I should do something, doesn’t actually change anything. Thinking that something would be a good idea for me to do, does not necessarily directly get me to do that thing. Feeling guilty and fretting about not doing something, REALLY changes nothing (except to raise my blood pressure).
I think sometimes, for a variety of reasons, we may get “shoulding” mixed up with actual doing. Granted, I do need to identify the necessary change, before I can take action. There are also stages of pre-change, where I’m contemplating it and getting my inner ecology in alignment with the action ahead of me.
Regardless, I’m sending this message primarily to encourage you to tell the truth, early and often, about your finances. To yourself first. To your spouse or partner next. To your cherished loved ones. The level of discretion is up to you; truth can be told in myriad ways.
Instead of, “I’m totally going to save more money in February” while also planning a vacation for March, how about something like this instead…
“I’m aware that it would be best for me in the long run to save more money. And, I’ve decided that the vacation in March is more important to me than saving money in February. I put a note on my calendar to revisit the saving idea when I get back from vacation.”
Another example. Instead of, “I should I should be saving for retirement”, how about this…
“I’m noticing that I’ve written it on my calendar 6 times and rescheduled it, to call about getting a retirement transfer going. I don’t feel like dealing with this. I wish I didn’t have to spend any time on it. Yet I know putting it off one more time would feel terrible. I’m going to take one little action on it right now.”
Notice mindfully when you’re full of talk about some financial action to be taken. No need to get upset in any way…I lovingly suggest you commit to one side of the fence or the other, and be clear about that.
Another good Truth tune, for inspiration:
Jeff Beck’s “Blues Deluxe” from the album Truth (since sometimes dealing with this stuff can indeed be blues deluxe)
Financial Organizing Menu
I’m doing a refresh and refinement of detailing what I help people with when working together. It will culminate in a workbook with questions and resources that have helped me along the way to financial healing. I’ll definitely keep you posted!
Please feel free to let me know if there are other relevant topics that you’d like me to offer thoughts on in upcoming newsletters and/or the Love the Zeros’ workbook.
Here’s the Love the Zeros’ menu of coaching topics:
- how to determine one’s financial net worth, and why that’s important
- creating and tracking a monthly spending plan, aka budget
- which financial tracking system may work best for you, why, and how to use it
- setting personalized goals, on a realistic timeline, and ways to track them over time
- how and why to work with an Accountability Partner; best features to look for when choosing one (or more)
- setting and keeping boundaries with your financial choices and preferences: with self, partner/spouse, family, friends, and at the workplace
- creating a customized game plan for eliminating debt
- healing from scarcity and fear-based financial behavior
- understanding financial reports: P &L’s and Balance Sheets can be your friends
- healing from financial trauma and/or betrayal, and action steps back to full health
- recovering from a compulsive spending or debting addiction
- communication tactics and practices for couples to talk kindly and clearly with each other about money issues
- bringing spiritual practice to the financial realm; finding your own source of inspiration and nourishment to help you continue the hard work this takes
Interesting Resources. Food For Thought.
- Thrifty Valentine’s Ideas
- Motley Fool article about average American earnings last year
retirement/general/2016/01/04/ heres-how-much-the-average- american-made-last-year.aspx? source=eogyholnk0000001&utm_ source=yahoo&utm_medium=feed& utm_campaign=article (Thanks to GP for calling my attention to this one…)
- David Bach and Marie Forleo. I have mixed feelings about his advice, but it’s a helpful interview to stimulate ideas.
- NerdWallet for comparing financial products
I was walking down the street yesterday, and realized that if my wallet was stolen or misplaced, I would not not have all the phone numbers easily on hand to cancel my credit and debit card, as well as the inventory of other cards I carry (health insurance, library, etc.). So tonight I’m putting a list of those phone numbers in my phone, as well as in writing at home in case the phone goes away with the wallet (knock wood).